Have you heard of the stages of grief, sometimes called the stages of loss or mourning? It is said to be a universal pilgrammage for grieving people; and so it seems to be a healthy thing, to move through these stages, and get "stuff" out of one's system so healing can take place and life can progress. I guess it also makes sense, that when you "lose your job" you might go through something similar to a mourning period. It's not a person that is lost, so I don't want to make as dramatic of a statement as grief, per se, to describe some of the feelings we go through being unemployed. But hey, if the act fits, maybe I should stage it.
According to experts, the five or seven stages of loss tend to range from the initial shock and denial, all the way through anger, bargaining, depression, and usually the experience is said to end at acceptance. We can see how some of these natural responses would be likely in the realm of the recently laid-off worker. For someone who had worked a very long time in a certain business or for a certain employer, I'm sure the effects are harder still to deal with. Many people truly love what they do, and they center a good portion of their life around their job, and spend a lot of time at their company and/or with the people at their company.
However, in the case of the unemployed, we have to be very careful about how long we catch ourselves lingering in some of the stages of grief. Because, unlike mourning the loss of a person, being unemployed isn't really a permanent situation. A job, unlike a person, can be replaced. Maybe not exactly the same job, but for all intents and purposes, one can resurrect one's work life.
So, for example, let's tread gingerly around the depression stage, shall we? If you feel the blues set in, that's understandable, but get some help, pronto, because you need confidence and energy to get out there in order to solve the cause of the depression stage in the first place. Meaning, you need to put your best foot forward to be re-employed. And if you're unemployed long enough to get to the acceptance stage, well... hmmmm. This is a bit perplexing. You must accept the loss of the old job, yes. That's all there is to it, though. Not to be harsh, but the fact is, it's gone. When it comes to employers, we're making room for the new.
I started this blog using the analogy of zombies and the scariness of being re-animated once bitten. You know, I gotta admit, zombieland has almost happened to me here over the last couple of weeks. The old fleece robe I banished two months ago has re-appeared as of late, sometimes remaining on my body until mid-afternoon. Loaded with cat hair. I noticed this as I sat here by the computer recently.
Actually, "noticed" is rather gentle. I kind of panicked. Because, I mean, I know I've gone mousy with my blonde, but really, has joblessness turned me this gray, this fast? Plus how much hair am I losing now? Turns out the "good news" is that it was gray cat hair all over my robe, not mine, in bad lighting, which made it so I couldn't tell for a minute there. Yet, I didn't really...get up. You know, to look closer. Until later. When I got food.
Eww. So, fortunately for me, I'm managing my stages fairly quickly. Like that Lazy/Crazy Stage I just passed out of. I washed that hair right out of my robe, and that grey right out of my day, and by that afternoon I had been called for a really great job interview. Funny how that works. Making room for the new.
Here's how I've found my Six Stages of Unemployment to be--all bearable, very natural, and quite usable for strengthening and self-improvement. Remember, we're kicking ass and finding inner peace this year. That's not a stage, it's a promise!
Stage 1: Chin Up I was optimistic and had a lot of energy to make the most of things. I set out to be a model of how to be laid off and still be okay...better than okay, actually: to thrive.
Stage 2: Sad I missed people I worked with, even though I knew them less than a year--I missed the idea of knowing them longer. One gal just got married and she sent pics. I cried over her happiness and wished we worked together during this, since we were there for her engagement, etc.
Stage 3: Settled I felt I should enjoy this time and maximize the heck out of it, undertaking many projects, being domestic, working on writing a novel, reading, getting taxes done, lunch with friends and family, cooking more and being more present with the home life and personal goals. Good.
Stage 4: Cranky I began to have my nose out of joint a little, with the low response to my resume submissions. Why are they not calling me back for interviews? Don't they realize/I'm doing every thing right? Increasingly hurt inside and irritated outside that I'm hardly being given a chance.
Stage 5: Lazy/Crazy Onset of zombieland syndrome; hairy robe sightings (went out to mailbox in said robe one afternoon), online job search efforts less frequent aka "not worth it," daily plan to do yoga and work on novel and update this blog consistently ignored. Greek yogurt spoiling in fridge.
Stage 6: Nervous ... but Sane. This is the honest stage, where I come back from the brink of zombieland to tell you the truth. I haven't been unemployed long enough to feel desperate, but I can see how that could become Stage 7. I also don't have small children, or elderly parents I must support, and my husband still has his job and insurance.
But I need to work, plain and simple. I need wages. We have obligations we must meet and goals we feel strongly about, as well. And there's a guilty feeling in all this, too, even though I know it's not "my fault" my company laid me off.
So, yes, I'm grateful we have family and a home to help us through when we need it, if it comes to that. I've said it before: I'm a lucky jobless person. I have enough for food, a computer, electricity, etc. However, I'm still nervous. I'm owning this stage. Just know this: I'm not letting this stage own me!
Showing posts with label unemployed. Show all posts
Showing posts with label unemployed. Show all posts
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
Tuesday, February 21, 2012
Thinking Outside the Jobbox
Being unemployed has required due diligence for weeks now. There has been plenty of time for filing of papers and keeping of copious notes. The first real payoff of any kind comes today, as I head out for my first interview since I was laid off in early January.
Whatever vigor I had a few weeks ago has admittedly waned a little since then. The job market is tough and the responses to my job applications and resume submissions have been slow to almost none. I am well-assured that is far from my fault. But I don't rest assured, if you know what I mean. Now that my unemployment benefits have kicked in, it's hard not to focus on how small of a payment those checks really are. And for me it's only been less than two months... gulp. After what I saw about the long-term unemployed on 60 Minutes last Sunday, I've felt an urge to swallow, hard.
That could be me. They were quality people with great resumes. They, too, had felt they had done everything they could. But they had been trying for a lot longer now. Still, this conversation shouldn't drop down too far--the segment showed there is hope. These people were getting through with innovative help and by thinking outside the box. For example, a man in his fifties was taking on a job as an intern, with a chance to earn his way to a full-time position. Well, why not, right? When you're jobless, internship is a job. He was happy as a lark, having something to do, a reason to get up and go somewhere every day. I guess there's a big employment benefit that's often overlooked: being productive and feeling useful.
I learned from the show that being jobless for a long time does seem to sap a certain amount of zest from even the sparkiest of folks. I don't want that to happen to me, or anyone I'm trying to be a cheerleader for. So while I do think it's best to keep at it, nose to grindstone and all that, I also think we need to maintain some side doors to other possible lands of whimsy and hallways of wonder. Would you ever consider going back to a job of your youth and starting over as an intern?
Maybe you have way more potential now. What about moonlighting--ever done it? Can it become a stronger possibility, now that you're unemployed? After all, you have time on your hands. You can give something a go, when you could never find time To Do it before.
I have some back roads and less trodden paths identified for myself. I also look around at other parts of the country, just to see what the cost of living would be like, if I worked for less in a place where it costs less to live. I've thought about having two part-time jobs instead of one full-time. Maybe there's room to grow a position along with a company. Even this blog was a seedling of an idea for potential income in the future. I don't know how yet...consulting, affiliates?
The point is, if jobs were boxes, you've kind of been dumped out of your old one, yes? No need to only search for the same kind of box to hop right back into. If you ever had a cat, you know how to do it. Fit yourself in there, even if it's sort of the wrong shape, go ahead, give it a squish and a squeeze. Or tip that other big box over and crawl inside the back corner real cool-like, cuz, yeah, you meant to do that.
Look, maybe you could work for a celebrity! www.findcelebrityjobs.com
Maybe you could get a job in the Caribbean! www.jobinthesun.com
Or maybe you could just get inspired, scratch a couple ideas together, and think outside your jobbox for a while. What might you do if there wasn't much holding you back? Be curious, like a cat. Tell your iPhone to call you Whiskers.
Just remember to change that when you go on your next job interview.
Whatever vigor I had a few weeks ago has admittedly waned a little since then. The job market is tough and the responses to my job applications and resume submissions have been slow to almost none. I am well-assured that is far from my fault. But I don't rest assured, if you know what I mean. Now that my unemployment benefits have kicked in, it's hard not to focus on how small of a payment those checks really are. And for me it's only been less than two months... gulp. After what I saw about the long-term unemployed on 60 Minutes last Sunday, I've felt an urge to swallow, hard.
That could be me. They were quality people with great resumes. They, too, had felt they had done everything they could. But they had been trying for a lot longer now. Still, this conversation shouldn't drop down too far--the segment showed there is hope. These people were getting through with innovative help and by thinking outside the box. For example, a man in his fifties was taking on a job as an intern, with a chance to earn his way to a full-time position. Well, why not, right? When you're jobless, internship is a job. He was happy as a lark, having something to do, a reason to get up and go somewhere every day. I guess there's a big employment benefit that's often overlooked: being productive and feeling useful.
I learned from the show that being jobless for a long time does seem to sap a certain amount of zest from even the sparkiest of folks. I don't want that to happen to me, or anyone I'm trying to be a cheerleader for. So while I do think it's best to keep at it, nose to grindstone and all that, I also think we need to maintain some side doors to other possible lands of whimsy and hallways of wonder. Would you ever consider going back to a job of your youth and starting over as an intern?
Maybe you have way more potential now. What about moonlighting--ever done it? Can it become a stronger possibility, now that you're unemployed? After all, you have time on your hands. You can give something a go, when you could never find time To Do it before.
I have some back roads and less trodden paths identified for myself. I also look around at other parts of the country, just to see what the cost of living would be like, if I worked for less in a place where it costs less to live. I've thought about having two part-time jobs instead of one full-time. Maybe there's room to grow a position along with a company. Even this blog was a seedling of an idea for potential income in the future. I don't know how yet...consulting, affiliates?
The point is, if jobs were boxes, you've kind of been dumped out of your old one, yes? No need to only search for the same kind of box to hop right back into. If you ever had a cat, you know how to do it. Fit yourself in there, even if it's sort of the wrong shape, go ahead, give it a squish and a squeeze. Or tip that other big box over and crawl inside the back corner real cool-like, cuz, yeah, you meant to do that.
Look, maybe you could work for a celebrity! www.findcelebrityjobs.com
Maybe you could get a job in the Caribbean! www.jobinthesun.com
Or maybe you could just get inspired, scratch a couple ideas together, and think outside your jobbox for a while. What might you do if there wasn't much holding you back? Be curious, like a cat. Tell your iPhone to call you Whiskers.
Just remember to change that when you go on your next job interview.
Friday, February 10, 2012
Places to Go, Jobs to See
At the very least, job seeking is an opportunity to learn about what other people do for a living. If you're open to looking around enough, you can run into all sorts of occupations that you might never have know existed. Companies and industries, too. There are websites that sell that? What, you mean there are actually people with those qualifications? Wow, who knew there was an entire industry devoted to serving just those people, and they're will to pay how much? And so on.
If you're open to considering new avenues for your own employment, this post, as well as the next several, are meant for you. I've run into some vertical veins of information for job seekers that could lead to a whole new view on where to look for work doing what you do, but in a new industry. For example, government work, which I'll focus on in a moment.
I've also discovered great sources for quick and easy leads for work in specific areas of the country, if your dream job is more about where and when (here and now!) than what. If you're into reinventing yourself, improving your odds, or reading success stories of others who've been where you're at and found happiness in new jobs, there are resources for all that, too. In short, there is no shortage of fine links with which I'll be linking us up. Bookmarking, then, may be an important To Do.
So here's something most of us might not have ever thought of: government work. We hear a lot about government jobs, but other than politics, the DMV and the post office, what does working for the government mean really?
There is a TON of information on this topic at a giant website for job seekers, www.job-hunt.org. This is a free portal to many directories and websites covering all sorts of job search resources. A one-stop shop if you will, but the information on federal and state employment is what drew me in. It sure is comprehensive:
job-hunt.org Government Job Search Info
I wondered what kind of work a writer or marketing professional such as myself could do in a government position. A look at the directory descriptions gave me some ideas:
I realized that employer recruiting pages for state and federal facilities could include the same types of positions that private companies would feature--banks and hospitals need marketing and educational materials created, and employee communications and websites exist in all these places. This will also apply to other job seekers. "Government" job listings could include everything from housekeepers to accountants to pilots to security guards to professors at state universities. So my vision of working for the feds in a trench coat and really conservative 2 inch heels, while kinda cool, turns out to be not really accurate or necessary.
Job-Hunt has links to tens of thousands of sources and pieces of advice to aid you in your job search. You can follow this resource on Twitter, too: @JobHuntOrg
If you're open to considering new avenues for your own employment, this post, as well as the next several, are meant for you. I've run into some vertical veins of information for job seekers that could lead to a whole new view on where to look for work doing what you do, but in a new industry. For example, government work, which I'll focus on in a moment.
I've also discovered great sources for quick and easy leads for work in specific areas of the country, if your dream job is more about where and when (here and now!) than what. If you're into reinventing yourself, improving your odds, or reading success stories of others who've been where you're at and found happiness in new jobs, there are resources for all that, too. In short, there is no shortage of fine links with which I'll be linking us up. Bookmarking, then, may be an important To Do.
So here's something most of us might not have ever thought of: government work. We hear a lot about government jobs, but other than politics, the DMV and the post office, what does working for the government mean really?
There is a TON of information on this topic at a giant website for job seekers, www.job-hunt.org. This is a free portal to many directories and websites covering all sorts of job search resources. A one-stop shop if you will, but the information on federal and state employment is what drew me in. It sure is comprehensive:
job-hunt.org Government Job Search Info
I wondered what kind of work a writer or marketing professional such as myself could do in a government position. A look at the directory descriptions gave me some ideas:
- Directory of Employers by State - links to over 8,000 employer recruiting pages (government, education, hospitals, banks, companies), job sites, job support groups, and more
- Directory of Government Employers - links to the recruiting sections of US Federal, state, and local employer websites plus links to associations of government employees, and articles on how to apply for these jobs
I realized that employer recruiting pages for state and federal facilities could include the same types of positions that private companies would feature--banks and hospitals need marketing and educational materials created, and employee communications and websites exist in all these places. This will also apply to other job seekers. "Government" job listings could include everything from housekeepers to accountants to pilots to security guards to professors at state universities. So my vision of working for the feds in a trench coat and really conservative 2 inch heels, while kinda cool, turns out to be not really accurate or necessary.
Job-Hunt has links to tens of thousands of sources and pieces of advice to aid you in your job search. You can follow this resource on Twitter, too: @JobHuntOrg
Friday, January 20, 2012
Sharp Edge, Soft Center
I decided to do some research on what employers want these days, just to make sure I have what it takes to increase my chances of getting hired, faster. If I do posess highly-valued qualities and skills, I want to make sure I'm saying so in my cover letters and on my resume. If I don't, then that gives me some ideas for what to work on while I'm unemployed.
The first thing I surmised via my research was no surprise: technical skills are very much in demand. This can mean anything from basic computer skills, to IT savvy, to literally having abilities in software programming, hardware configuration or other stuff. By other stuff I mean things I don't have the technical skills to describe off the top of my head. By top of my head I mean right above the inside of my brain where a cartoon bear playing cymbals is dancing with a monkey in a conductor suit right now because of the possibility of more technical talk.
So we see where things shake out for me in the area of technical skills. Really quite good with the computer skills, given my trade. I speak the language of typing things and presenting them on paper and on screen, and even in design, I recognize the programs. I'm usually a PC but I've been a mac and can be one again, would welcome it. Totally down with the internet. Get the engines and all that. I blog, I tweet, I fb. After that enters the dancing bear.
Watch this space to learn how I add to my edge with technical skills while I am unemployed.
The best news I found via my research was that soft skills are still very much in demand by employers, and will be highly sought after for those hiring in 2012. In a recent report by the National Association of Colleges and Employers (NACE), findings from a job outlook survey of 244 employers showed that they will be looking for evidence of these top five skills on a resume:
The first thing I surmised via my research was no surprise: technical skills are very much in demand. This can mean anything from basic computer skills, to IT savvy, to literally having abilities in software programming, hardware configuration or other stuff. By other stuff I mean things I don't have the technical skills to describe off the top of my head. By top of my head I mean right above the inside of my brain where a cartoon bear playing cymbals is dancing with a monkey in a conductor suit right now because of the possibility of more technical talk.
So we see where things shake out for me in the area of technical skills. Really quite good with the computer skills, given my trade. I speak the language of typing things and presenting them on paper and on screen, and even in design, I recognize the programs. I'm usually a PC but I've been a mac and can be one again, would welcome it. Totally down with the internet. Get the engines and all that. I blog, I tweet, I fb. After that enters the dancing bear.
Watch this space to learn how I add to my edge with technical skills while I am unemployed.
The best news I found via my research was that soft skills are still very much in demand by employers, and will be highly sought after for those hiring in 2012. In a recent report by the National Association of Colleges and Employers (NACE), findings from a job outlook survey of 244 employers showed that they will be looking for evidence of these top five skills on a resume:
- Teamwork
- Leadership
- Written Communication (hooray!)
- Problem-Solving
- Work Ethic
Friday, January 13, 2012
Lucky Friday
One cool thing about being unemployed is that I get to keep
coming up with more things to add to my list of cool things about being
unemployed. I figure it’s easier for most people come up with what stinks about losing
your job. But I’m naturally drawn to what might be more of a challenge for others: taking
notice of the unexpected good stuff...
A while ago, I thought I had to take today off, because I had three appts. to keep—two doctors and a dentist. When I told the doc that just now, he said, that’s too bad, now it’s sort of the other way around… as in, I have to spoil my day off to go around to all these appointments. I didn’t even think of it that way! But it’s Friday, and he was “stuck” at work, and there I was, with no job to be at. And it’s the 13th --to some, maybe I’m the lucky one, eh? Like I always say, perspective is everything.
-
Right away I noticed how it’s really great to be able
to stay in your jammies in the morning, and wait to shower till you
feel like it.
- Back down closer to the pj level is how you can keep in touch with former coworkers, but you don’t have to be as guarded now, or as “on.” Maybe they can know you swear.
- You can get things done that ran the risk of stressing you out or getting blown off before, when you had your job. Doctor. Taxes. Summer sandals away. I mean Christmas decor.
- You can meet people for breakfast or brunch.
- You can take a day off without telling anyone. Name your Snow Day. Call it Friday.
A while ago, I thought I had to take today off, because I had three appts. to keep—two doctors and a dentist. When I told the doc that just now, he said, that’s too bad, now it’s sort of the other way around… as in, I have to spoil my day off to go around to all these appointments. I didn’t even think of it that way! But it’s Friday, and he was “stuck” at work, and there I was, with no job to be at. And it’s the 13th --to some, maybe I’m the lucky one, eh? Like I always say, perspective is everything.
And that changed my perspective for today. I have one more
appointment this afternoon. Otherwise, I’ve decided I’ll just do a quick little
job searchy with the state of Illinois to see what’s new out there, and that’s
all for “work.” I’m going to make a fire in the fireplace, catch up on some
personal To Dos for Today, and say TGIF.
I’m spending Friday, my way. When I’m back to being at work
somewhere, maybe I can keep this idea going in some fashion. I can plan my
Fridays to be filled with cool things about being employed. All week longs, I’ll
take notice of all the unexpected good stuff about my better new job, and then
on Friday, I’ll make sure I enjoy them.
Today, at work or at home, I hope you do the same!
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